Silence of a man
Friday, November 12th, 2004Life is a complicated thing. In the day-to-day happenings of life there are so many people to take into consideration. Some are direct, some are not. Certain arenas of society and modes of interaction beg more complication than others, and certain types of people induce a more cautious nature. At times this can be somewhat trying.
I firmly believe that honesty is the best policy, but sometimes the truth is not the most pleasant option, and perhaps not necessarily essential to a situation. Also, when does failing to disclose information cross the line between omittance and lie? Wouldn’t it be great if we could all just be strong enough in ourselves, and confident enough in the goodness of others to just state how things are, what we think, what we feel, not in an offensive or affronting way, but just as an honest statement of truth? Facts, opinions, emotions would be out there, to do with what is needed. No more worrying over things unknown, or harm over things misspoken.
Granted, this will never happen. People have feeling, people have mean opinions, insecurities, misinterpretations, agendas, alterior motives. Every time you share something personal, you can’t just share it, you have to analyze it… how will it affect me, how will it affect them, does it really need to be said. At least, that’s what goes through my mind. I always try to analyze what I say before saying it, presuming it is something of actual merit and not just a quip. Sometimes I wish I could just say things and get them over with, but sadly, such is not my style.
And so life continues… I will deliberate every sentence, analyze every statement I make, and hope that I don’t hurt, upset, annoy (well, at least unintentionally), pester, tweak, inconvenience or otherwise exasperate anyone. I won’t even post an entry about it, for fear that one of the 2 people a month who wander by might be someone who it pertains too. So, instead, I turn inward, to play the conversations out to myself alone, various thoughs bouncing around never to be heard by another. At least it’s not boring.