Johannes printed off a bunch of Rich Mullins songs a while ago to add to the huge stack of songs we have on the piano that we play all the time. I had previously known one or two of them, but he loaned me one of Rich Mullin’s CDs (the last one, actually) and I have been listening to them, and realizing more and more how awesome they are. The lyrics I think are even more impressive than the music. The lyrics of the following made me think when I stopped to read them:
Hard To Get
You who live in heaven
Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
Who are afraid of being left by those we love
And who get hardened in the hurt
Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape
To find the faith to ask for daily bread
Did You forget about us after You had flown away
Well I memorized every word You said
Still I’m so scared, I’m holding my breath
While You’re up there just playing hard to get
You who live in radiance
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in skin
We have a love that’s not as patient as Yours was
Still we do love now and then
Did You ever know loneliness
Did You ever know need
Do You remember just how long a night can get?
When You were barely holding on
And Your friends fall asleep
And don’t see the blood that’s running in Your sweat
Will those who mourn be left uncomforted
While You’re up there just playing hard to get?
And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained
And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow All I really need to know
Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can’t see what’s ahead
And we can not get free of what we’ve left behind
I’m reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All these words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can’t see how You’re leading me
unless You’ve led me here
Where I’m lost enough to let myself be led
And so You’ve been here all along I guess
It’s just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get.
– Rich Mullins
Something tocuhed me about the part about being lost enough enough to let myself be led. It just reminded me that God works in mysterious ways sometimes, that may even seem like abandonment at the time, but He always knows what is best for us, evening when we have no clue. Our God truly is an awesome God.